Contest: Win a free pair of tickets to see Colin Quinn on Broadway in "Long Story Short"!

Hey, you there. Yes, you.

Would you like to see Colin Quinn on Broadway in his latest one-man show, "Long Story Short"? Would you like to see that show for free? Well, you may be in luck.

First, watch this video of Anderson Cooper interviewing Colin Quinn and his director, Jerry Seinfeld.

 

OK. Done yet? Now follow these simple steps.

1) Read this post. You're doing great so far!

2) Leave a comment on this post.

3) In your comment, let me know what historical empire you're most looking forward to hear Colin Quinn joke about and why.

4) Be sure to fill out a valid email when you're commenting so I can contact you.

5) If you've done all of that and left my favorite comment, then you win!

Colin Quinn's "Long Story Short" has its official opening night tonight, with a limited 11-week engagement through January 2011.

Comments

[Brian J.]

The Ottoman Empire. Any empire "responsible for foot rests" is a-ok in my book!

[Juliofromny]

I'm looking forward to Colin going off on the Roman Empire. Especially the part where Nero Is burning down a town, playing the fiddle and dancing a jig :D

[sam zayvan]

I want to see Colin Quinn talk about the Roman Empire because I see Colin Quinn as a modern-day repressed Caligula

[Rob]

The Roman Empire, so Colin can publicly thank them for their sweet, sweet pizza. Thanks Romans!

[Dave]

All of them. I took at date to the premier of his short-lived show on NBC and would like to redeem myself. I heard this show is much better.

[Billy Procida]

He's just hysterical!

I want to hear him talk about Alexander the Great. One: because I'm in school and have to learn about him right now. Two: because it just seemed like he named every new city after himself. "What shall we call this city?" "How about Alexander?" "But Alex, we already HAVE 3 cities named Alexander." "Fine...Alexand...ra."

[Mike]

The Boardwalk Empire cause I find it hard to believe there was a time when Atlantic City contained anything but depressing 60-year-old dudes pumping nickels into Addam's Family slot machines

[Drew]

The Nazi-Germany Empire...Simply because he has the ability to take the most taboo topics and make every person in the audience crack up.

[Steve G.]

I'd like to see him pick apart The Ming Empire.....besides being responsible for all those cool vases, there's also that "merciless" dude with the awesome ring and the smokin' daughter. I think James Bond, that dude from Fiddler on the Roof, and some guy who was in playgirl eventually beat him to a rockin' soundtrack, but any guy who can make "Hot Hail" is OK in my book.

[Micah H.]

I'd like to hear him talk about the Ottoman Empire, mostly because I can't believe a school bus driver in Springfield had enough muscle and savvy to pull it off. He never seemed that motivated to me.

[Victor]

Carthage. The Anti-Rome.

Rome burned it to the ground and sowed the land with salt after their version of WW3, so they would never be able to rebuild. Pretty harsh

[Rick]

The Mongols of Genghis Khan. Because any race that can conquer the world and be a slang for a person with Down's Syndrome needs in-depth analysis. That and the Devo song "Mongoloid" kicks ass.

[Ted]

I'd like him to riff on the Egyptians. I think I have a lot in common with that civilization. For instance, we both liked to leave comments on blog posts in order to try and win things.

[Justin]

What, no love for the Greeks? Sure they are down on their luck now, but boy, you should have see them back in the day! Philosophizing, creating theater and algebra, and let's not forget orgies! Yeah, some good stuff.

[Larry Salazar]

Byzantine Empire. Oh snap, I know he's gonna have something to say about those sneaky bastards.

[Michael Glazer]

Mongol Empire- Ghengis Khan's swift overtaking of most the known world in the 1200's. They wore almost no armor in combat, choosing speed over safety, and utilized smoke to blind their opponents. These same techniques are used today in ground warfare.
Also, Khan's empire was run by central assembly. He was a warlord open to listening to a group of peers about political matters. This is still used today too. Plus, all religions were tolerated. Very progressive, and kind of accepted today.

[Steve G.]

Any updates?? Has a winner been chosen?? What did you think of the entries??

[Sean]

Yes. Sorry. A winner has been chosen and notified. Decided to give Dave a second chance to redeem himself with a date! Thank you all for participating!