the comic's comic

Mitch Hedberg, calling from Big Bear

Life is funnier when you hear about it from Mitch Hedberg.

A lot of comedians say performing stand-up is the closest they can get to being a rock star. Hedberg comes closer to that ideal than most. When I caught up with him at his Southern California home, Hedberg was trying to enjoy his first couple of days off in more than four months. And he was beside himself.

"When I finally get off the road, if I'm not doing comedy or onstage, I don't know what to do with myself," he said. "I need to get a hobby."

Most audiences probably think otherwise, that Hedberg's life is too full of fun, that perhaps he lives the comic's version of the rock star mantra: sex, drugs and stand-up comedy. That, however, is a simplistic reading of his performance style. "A new (comic) thought that," Hedberg said. "But then he saw me. ... I think people are just misconceived." He recalled: "It was more I had to get over some stage fright, and the material I was doing wasn't getting a lot of laughs." So he improvised. And in doing so, he found his voice. "I remember one week in particular in Denver, I had been doing (stand-up) for 7 1/2 years and it all sort of came together for me."

Even now, after multiple appearances on The Late Show With David Letterman and ranking near the top on a Comedy Central stand-up contest, Hedberg said his performances are not as effortless as they may seem. When he tries out new material, it's still hit-or-miss.

Hedberg said one city might love the new jokes, and the second won't go along for the ride. "What's going on? Those people in that other town must have been messing with me." More often, though, it's Hedberg who messes with your perception of reality.

Take these two bits from his Comedy Central special:

"I went to see a band in New York. The lead singer got on the microphone, and he said: 'How many of you people feel like human beings tonight?' Then he said: 'How many of you feel like animals?' And everyone cheered after the animals part. But the thing is, I cheered after the human being part because I did not know that there was a second part to the question."

"An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. You would never see an 'Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order' sign, just 'Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.' "

Hedberg has a new CD in the works on Comedy Central's record label. And he wants to film another concert special or a full-length comedy concert that he could submit to the Sundance Film Festival. Hedberg wrote, directed and starred in a 1999 comedy, Los Enchiladas!, that appeared at Sundance. The film also features Dave Attell and Marc Maron. It's tough to find a copy of the movie, though, so Hedberg said he'll put it on DVD and sell it on his Web site (www.mitchhedberg.net) along with his CDs and cinnamon roll incense.

"The more you write your own ticket, the better," he said. "Because people aren't going to run to you."

Caroline Rhea balances TV with stand-up

Caroline Rhea has fond memories of Arizona. The Montreal native's father lives in Tucson, and Rhea spent some of her proverbial formative years there attending the University of Arizona in the mid-1980s.

She had yet to learn about "those giant cardboard sunglasses you put in the front of the car," and she emerged from her car a little, well, sticky. "I looked like I had the Franklin Mint tattooed on my thigh," Rhea said.

By then, she already knew she was going to become a comedian. Heck, she knew that when she was 6 or 7. "I'd watch Carol Burnett and say, 'I want to be her,' " Rhea said.

Rhea has since established her own TV presence -- after several years as Aunt Hilda on Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, many appearances on Hollywood Squares and now in her first year hosting daytime talker The Caroline Rhea Show.

And she's managed to meet her idol, Burnett, more than a few times. "Each time, I freak out and tell her how much I worship her," Rhea said.

When Rhea hits the stand-up circuit these days, she now has her own set of fans to freak her out. Her act is not all that different from when she started in 1989. She might have new things to talk about. Her upcoming wedding already provides plenty of fodder for skits on her talk show. And being on TV makes some in her audience "feel like they know me a little bit more than before." What does freak her out is being reminded of what she looked or sounded like on shows that continue to run in repeats.

"You're eternally trapped," Rhea said. "It's like looking at Sabrina in syndication. Bad haircuts and strong medications." These days, Rhea tapes six shows a week in New York (sometimes two each day), then performs stand-up in clubs around the country on weekends when she can. It's everything she expected and a little bit more.

"I didn't think it would be this exhausting," said Rhea. But her weekend gigs more than make up for it. A comedian to the core, she said stand-up is her one true love. "For me, that's the most fun," she said. "What's most satisfying to me is doing a live performance."